Maurine and I celebrated our 17^th anniversary a few weeks ago.  I wonder why it takes an anniversary for me to tell Maurine how much I love her. I try to think about my life without her and I can’t. I wish I could say I am the perfect husband, but I am not, I have a lot to learn.  She has put up with so much from me over the years. I am not the best communicator with Maurine. I would really appreciate your prayers to help me be better in this area. Another weakness is family time. In my world, if we are in the same room and even if we don’t say a word, I consider it family time; it took me a while to figure out  that isn’t her world.  I still forget that my world isn’t everyone else’s world. Yeah it is all about me. 

 In the morning she feeds the kids, gets them ready for school, gets ready herself, works out, reads the Bible and the list could go on and on. I on the other hand take care of me and that is tough enough.  I am so fortunate and don’t even realize it.  I actually am spoiled. 

God placed Maurine in my life and I am so grateful.  Our journey over the years has been pretty amazing. Only God could write this story and I am fortunate enough to have a part in her life. I thank God for the love of my life, Maurine.

Last year, I met a man at work who I will refer to as John(not his real name).  John has had a really rough time the past few years. John is homeless and lives out of his car at a truck stop in Oklahoma City.  At one time, John had a good life.  Now he sleeps in his car, takes a shower at the truck stop, then gets dressed and goes to work. John is in retail sales.  If you saw him you would never know he is homeless.  He wears a 3 piece suit to work and he is by far the best dressed homeless man I have ever seen! 

About 2 months ago his car broke down.  The only use the car is to him now is a place to sleep.  He doesn’t have any way of getting to  work now, so he can’t afford to get his car fixed or to be able to save to afford a new one.  The crazy thing is his boss still wants him to come back to work – even after not working for 2 months.  I have been torn up about what I need to  do.  I have even thought about giving him my car, but then what would that mean for me and my family.

A few months ago, I found John a place to live for free so that he could get his car fixed, he refused.  The reason he told me he refused is because of his past, he is a convicted sex offender.  John told me the story when I first met him a year ago and he says he was falsely convicted.  At times I have wondered if he is being truthful with me but for some reason my heart pours out to him.  It hurts me every time I talk to him.   I do not want to enable him, I want him to do things on his own, but as Christians I know that we are called to help each other and to show love to each other. The help I have offered he won’t accept, probably because of his past he is afraid he will get beaten up in a homeless shelter.

All I know is John is gripped by fear. He is paralyzed from his past and can’t or won’t do anything to help himself.  He has a story, just as everyone does.  He struggles with why would God allow all of these things to happen to him.  He did finally agree to counseling this week and I am very excited about that.  But for now, I am still trying to help figure out John’s transportation situation and being able to get him back to work and eventually being able to find him a place to live.  Thoughts and prayers are appreciated.

 I was watching TV this morning and flipping through the channels.  I usually watch Joyce Meyer, but there was a commercial on when I turned it there.  Of course I couldn’t watch a commercial, so I changed it to James Robison’s Life Reach today.  Beth Moore was speaking and she was doing a great job as usual, but that isn’t what shook me. When she was finished speaking, James starting talking about some children in a foreign country. He spoke of these kids who didn’t have shoes and how they were getting bacterial infections from the cuts in their feet. Some of the children are dying.  As I was watching it,  my 8 year old said “what is wrong with that girl”? I had to explain she didn’t have shoes and she might get sick without them. Then he asked if the adults had shoes and I had to say “no.”  Then in my mind came the why don’t you help them.  Of course the enemy started telling me who do you think you are and you are only one, so it really doesn’t matter if you help them or not.  I had  to capture my thoughts because at first I was believing them.

 I then decided that I do need to do something about it. I am going to do what I do best and that is tell as many people as I can, one person at a time.  The shoes cost $3.60 a pair, less than a cup of coffee at some places!   

 Shoes aren’t a luxury for these children, they are a necessity. A pair of shoes could literally save a life. I am attaching a website where you can purchase if you feel called.  My prayer is that together we can make a difference in these children’s lives.

 http://www.lifetoday.org/site/PageServer

 While driving to work this morning, I heard a song and the lyrics said we are just a phone call from being on our knees.  How true is that? I have a friend at work, who last week got a phone call and was told his dad had a massive heart attack. Today in the office, another co-worker received a call and was told her  dad was being transported to the hospital because of heart problems.

 One phone call and  we are on our knees praying to God.  Our life is going normal then bam we receive a call that could change our lives. This made me start thinking about my life.  

 I always say I am preparing for tomorrow, but is it what God wants?  Do you prepare for tomorrow or live for today? When I read His word it tells me to do both.  Where there is no vision the people perish.  The Lord’s prayer says my daily bread not tomorrow’s bread. There are many more verses but those are ones that just popped in my head.

 I have been observing my friends during this time leaning on God.  I really believe I should live for TODAY when it comes to sharing my love for Jesus Christ. I really don’t know if there will be a tomorrow. What about my kids? I disciple others but do I disciple them?  I know this is wrong but I always say I will really dive in to them later after I get through with others. My family is getting leftovers, how sad! This is something I have to/will correct. I would also like it if you would hold me accountable.

 So God showed me what I need to change today. What is it that you need to change just in case you received that phone call?

Leadership is the word for today.  I have read many books, attended seminars, listened to CD’s, downloaded podcasts and watched DVD’s.  My mentor and I discuss leadership qualities, what I have learned is I know a lot of stuff. 

I recently took some time off from these types of methods of leadership development.  A couple months ago, I heard Francis Chan speak  and when he was asked what books are you reading, he responded with a statement that rocked me. He responded that he wasn’t reading anything other than the Bible. Whoa, I wasn’t ready for that answer. So my sabbatical began.

 I had some pretty interesting thoughts during this time. As I read the Bible and compared it to leadership books I have read,  I realized how similar they are. We have the knowledge but we don’t always do what it says. We are missing the call to action part. 

Call to action can be related to anything we do, whether it is with our finances, leadership, helping someone in need or being guided by the “Holy Spirit”.  It isn’t our knowledge, it is our actions that count.  What is it that you know you should be doing, but aren’t?

My parents divorced when I was very young. I remember moving to an apartment complex “Rolling Meadows” when I was about to start the third grade and I lived there until I was in tenth grade.  They were lower income apartments, so I got to experience more than the average person.  I remember a shooting, a guy with a gun on a car, guys getting busted for growing weed in the fields and much more. Before you say “how sad”, what I really remember was how much fun I had living there. I remember my friends, Phil, Randy, Rodney, David, and Kris.  We all loved sports and they consumed our lives. It didn’t matter if it was a 100 degrees outside or if it was freezing cold.   We still played football, basketball, baseball, golf and one year we played hockey on the ice with sticks and smashed soda cans – that was a blast!

My friend Phil was 2 years older than me and he was the leader of the group. He kept me out of trouble and pushed me to be the best I could be in sports.  I know he was only 2 years older but he was my mentor/father figure. I spent the majority of my time with him.  I could have easily chosen the wrong path, but God placed Phil in my life for a reason.  I could have easily been smoking cigarettes, doing drugs, drinking or just getting in trouble, but I didn’t. Phil didn’t have to say a word, all he had to do was look at me in a disappointed way and I would change my behavior.

Has there been in a time in your life where it could have been bad, but God put someone around you that made it good? I know everything is meant to glorify God. We just don’t see it at the time it is happening, but sometimes we see it years later.

When I worked for Wal-Mart, one phrase everyone said: “the only thing constant is change.”  I am in a season of change and I like it.  This change is stretching my mind and getting me out of my comfort zone.  Some changes are small but very exciting, like re-arranging our office.  I am so excited about this small change.  

Another change we are tinkering with is our auditorium layout. We have had this same layout since 2003, perfect time for a change.  I think this season of change is going to lead me to live in a world of organized chaos for a period, and I am excited about it.  I told one of the ladies in the office about living in a world of organized chaos, and she said that scared her because she is too close to my world.

Is there something in your world that needs to change? Act on it.

Eight years ago today my youngest son Evan was born.  I love that little guy so much, he is so funny and has such a fun personality. I really have to watch what I say around him because he is the child that will go to school and tell his friends what his dad said.  He is such a blessing to have in our lives. His entrance in to this world wasn’t an easy one though.

Evan came in to this world and didn’t want to be here. He wanted to go back to heaven. When Evan was born he was diagnosed with Pulmonary Hypertension and Respiratory Stress Disorder.  All I really knew about those fancy words was Evan didn’t want to breathe on his own.  We didn’t even get to hold him after he was born for a week.  He was intebated within 24 hours of his arrival to the world.   He was in the neo-natal intensive care unit (NICU) and stayed there for 2 weeks – a short amount of time compared to some people whose babies are in the NICU.  This was the toughest 2 weeks of my life. I think this was probably the first time I ever really prayed to God. It wasn’t an artificial dinner prayer. I mean this was tears, pain and brokenness. I remember being so happy when his oxygen level got up and I can remember like yesterday the first time Maurine got to hold him and feed him. My prayers had been answered. It was a miracle.

I look back at this season and see how God pulled us through.  But sometimes I look at the seasons in my life and think man things are bad, where is God? Then I look back at Evan’s birth and I remember he is here, he is always here.

Happy Birthday Evan and thank you God for this special little gift you gave me. Evan’s arrival into this world drew me closer to you and I will never forget that.

My 25^th high school reunion is next month. I can’t believe it has been 25 years since I graduated high school! 

When did time start moving so fast? When I was in school it seemed to move so very slow. Now a year flies by in a blink of an eye. How has this happened?  Was it when I started working and wasn’t able to get everything done in a day?  Was it when I got married?  Was it when I had kids?  Lots of questions that I really don’t know the answer to.  It has made me think about my future though.

We really are only on this earth for a short period of time. When I do meet with God will he say “job well done” or “Rodney you did good but why didn’t you tell your neighbors about me?  You didn’t help the homeless man on the corner, you just looked at him and drove on, all the time wondering what his true motives were, well Rodney, that was ME”.  OUCH! 

Our time on earth is but a vapor, yet we are so worried about the things of this world. God is Truth and the world is full of lies, we tend to listen to the lies.  God should be the only ONE I care about and listen to. Eternity with him is beautiful ,yet we all struggle with lies from the enemy. Daily, hourly or whatever it takes we must renew our mind and identify the lies daily. 

If you met with God today what would he say?